Last minute prep and fun.......

Mrs. Southern States International 2013, yours truly, having fun with Joey, Terri and Clay before heading to Chicago this weekend.  This gown says it all!

 

 

 

Many people ask me "Why did you decide to compete in pageants?" Here is my why.

In 2009, my family doctor ordered a series of tests on my heart and lungs.  I was experiencing shortness of breath and fatigue with even slight exertion during daily physical activities.  The tests revealed I had a slight thickening of a muscle in the lower right chamber of my heart, as well as some build up of fluid around my heart.  I was prescribed four medicines and advised to change my diet and exercise more.  Over the next five years, I began to eat healthier and exercise some.  In 2011, I had more tests on my heart, received a good report and was allowed to stop taking the heart medications.  However, fluid retention remained a problem because I was still not physically fit.  Congestive heart failure runs in my family.  My Daddy and brother battle the disease every day.  I knew, in order to get healthy and stay healthy, I had to dedicate myself to a wellness plan which included eating healthy and staying active.  Volunteering my time as a Certified Personal Crisis Life Coach for Hearts of Love International is the most important activity in my life, outside my responsibilities to my family.  Being a life coach requires mental and emotional, rather than physical exercise.  Desiring to add a dimension to my life that would encourage me to get fit but still allow me to promote Hearts of Love, I entered to compete in a Mrs. International preliminary pageant.  Mrs. International is a volunteer and community service centered pageant and also encourages health and fitness.  The American Heart Association's Go Red for Women program is Mrs. International's national platform.  Through Go Red for Women, not only have I discovered heart healthy choices for me, I share my story with countless women who struggle as I have.  The national pageant will be next month in Chicago where I will be representing the region I live and volunteer in as Mrs. Southern States International 2013.  Having dedicated myself to becoming healthier and to sharing Hearts of Love International's hope for healing message with the largest audience possible, my desire is to be an example for positive and healthy change.  See you in Chicago!


Here are a few people who are inspiring me along my journey:


My husband, Billy, stands beside me in life as well as on the stage.

Our three daughters are always an inspiration through my life as well as pageant journey.



  

Hannah Raelyn

 

 

  

 

Melanie Ann

 

 

 

 

 

Lesley Anne

 

Mrs. Southern States International 2013 goes international!

Last month, I traveled extensively along the eastern coast of Canada.  While visiting various locations, I took the opportunity to represent the International Pageants and Hearts of Love International.  Here are a few pictures of my appearances.

 

A delicious lobster roll is a must at this popular seaside restaurant in Portland, Maine.

 

 

 

 

Sydney, Nova Scotia and the Scottsman.  The bagpipes are his specialty.

 



These guys really had me going in Halifax, Nova Scotia

My cousin, friend and sometimes photographer, Angie Hewitt.

Life Coach Tip: The power of incorrect thinking...

As a life coach, I talk with many individuals struggling to move on from an event in their life that is holding them "hostage" emotionally.  As I listen to clients tell me how they feel about themselves and why they are emotionally scarred, many times a common truth comes to light.  What is this truth?  When a person is thinking the future holds no purpose for them, it may be because they truly believe something that is not true.  In other words, they are believing a lie about their future.  It may sound like an easy situation to solve but far from it.  Prolonged emotional trauma can lead to depression, and once a person has reached this threshold, it can take a while to return to a place where the individual is no longer controlled by incorrect thinking.  Just as depression does not come upon a person quickly, neither does curing depression happen speedily.  Depending on the depth of the emotional trauma, a person may benefit from seeing a professional life coach once a week or so.  However, in the more serious cases, clients often need daily life coaching and nurturing.  Hearts of Love International's Retreat Centers offer day long programs as well as extended stay programs, whichever best suits clients' needs.  www.heartsofloveinternational.org 

Mrs. Southern States International 2013 sings with the Texarkana Regional Chorale.

Singing with the Texarkana Regional Chorale is one of my favorite community activities.  The chorale performs benefit concerts throughout the year and features some of best vocalists in the Texarkana area.  Marc-Andre Bougie is our director, and his talent and expertise are a blessing to all who work with him.  Here are pictures from the  Black History Month Concert, our most popular concert of the season.  Pictured are Marc-Andre Bougie, conductor and director, Candice Taylor, soloist and the Texarkana Regional Chorale and the Texarkana Symphony Orchestra.

New Retreat Locations

Our new retreat center, River Rest, has opened near Birmingham, Alabama.  This beautiful facility is the perfect place to serve anyone struggling to move past an emotionally stressful life event.  We also have a lovely retreat center in Kaufman, Texas just outside of Dallas.  San Diego, California will be home to Hearts of Love International's newest retreat center, opening soon.

Life Coach Tip: "Control your thoughts. Reign them in."

These words were spoken many years ago by a famous minister.  It has been about ten years since I first heard the words spoken.  Now, having learned the truth, that we can have control of our thoughts, I regret I did not know I could control what thoughts or ideas occupy my mind until a few years ago.  Because I have purposed in my heart not to live in a state of regret, I am thankful I now have the information and tools to maintain healthy and positive thought processes.

As a personal crisis life coach, controlling negative thoughts is one of the first areas I address with a client.  To show how simple it is to stop sad, ugly or negative thinking is as easy as singing a song.  That's right!!!  Do you know the mind cannot repeat the words of a song, or other memorized words, while thinking about something else?  Try this exercise.  When your mind drifts to unpleasant ideas, immediately start singing a song you love, either out loud or silently.  Sing all day if you must, but keep those negative thoughts at bay.  Read something, recite something you memorized in the past, turn on music and sing along.  Even if you are sitting at a desk at work and are not allow to have music playing, then sing silently.  Learning to banish negative thinking is a process.  The more you do it, the easier it will become.

If you are having problems with worry or unpleasant thoughts, I hope you will give this exercise a try.  It absolutely works, and you will enjoy days free of negative thinking.

Next time, I will blog about challenging incorrect thinking, things we hear over and over again that we believe are true but certainly are not.

Personal Crisis Life Coach

Time and again, I have people ask me "What is a life coach?".  There are many types of life coaches who help guide clients into making better choices, from diet and exercise, relationship decisions, correcting bad behavior, etc..  My life coaching focuses on helping clients who have experienced a tragic or traumatic life event, get back on their feet and overcome the fear and self-doubt that often accompanies tragedy in one's life.  I use several tools to help with the process.  With access to over 46 workbooks written by Dr. Frank Minirth, a distinguished psychiatrist and author, each designed for a specific personal trauma, there is usually one or more workbooks the client can work through to help them challenge the thought processes that keep them from moving forward with their life in a positive, healthy way.  Listening is my greatest tool.  Because of the retreat environment in which I work, I make an effort to spend time with clients before I sit down with them for a personal one-on-one coaching session.  After observing a client for a while, we meet privately and I invite them to share with me the events that led them to seek help.  I listen to them with empathy and never morally judge them.  It is through this time of openess that I earn their trust so the client will be receptive to advice.  After deciding which workbooks will help the client gain emotional strength, I begin to guide them through the workbook and they work sections by themselves, then we meet together at least once a day to go over their progress.  The progress stage is different with each client.  No two people are alike, and I respect the differences in each individual.  I pray for wisdom while life coaching because helping a distraught client is a great responsibility.  Later, I will blog about another tool I use when coaching:  How to banish negative thoughts from the mind.

Meet Arnel Pineda, a true humanitarian with a larger than life vocal talent.

Four years ago, I purchased concert tickets to see the rock band, Journey, in Memphis, Tennessee.  My sister-in-law and I had second row seats, and I was thrilled to finally be seeing one of my favorite bands of all time.  I must admit, when Steve Perry did not appear on stage to sing I was somewhat stunned.  The singer was a man named Arnel Pineda.  His voice was so outstanding, I thought surely he must be lipsyncing to Steve Perry.  Well, it did not take long for me to realize it was Arnel singing, and I was shocked by his unbelieveable talent.  I would never dream anyone could fill Steve Perry's shoes, but fill them to overflowing he did.  After the show, I heard many rude and hateful comments directed toward Arnel by fans of Steve Perry, and the life coach in me kicked in.  I reached out to Arnel on Facebook, and he answered my message.  I reassured him he had the greatest singing voice I have ever heard.  As a young girl I had seen Elvis in concert, who gave me a scarf I still have, so I feel I know a GREAT talent when I see and hear one.  Arnel Pineda will go down in history as one of the greatest talents of all time.

As Arnel and I corresponded over many months, I came to learn of the School for Street Kids he was trying to develop in his home country, the Philippines.  The children who benefit from the school are innocent victims of the poverty they are born into.  Arnel knows about this because, for a while, he was a street kid himself.  I am an founding sponsor of the Arnel Pineda School for Street Kids and look forward to visiting the school in  December 2013.

The documentary detailing Arnel's life before reaching super stardom in his 40's is "Don't Stop Believing:  Everyman's Journey" which is now showing in selected theaters.  It will be available to own later this year, and I have already preordered my copy.  It is a must see.  You will be amazed by his unbelievable voice and his humble, genuine personality.  I am blessed to call him "friend".




"On behalf of the volunteers and other precious donors of APFI, and my family especially, I would like to thank you for all the unconditional support and valuable monetary donations that you, without reservation, have extended to us.  You are indeed one of our heroes and will be for the street children here in the Philippines who hugely benefit from your help.  God bless your heart, Vickie."--Arnel Pineda, March 7, 2013


Click below to see Arnel's movie trailer

 

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0cIj3OPM2k

 

 

 

Pictures in paradise

While visiting Big Creek Ranch earlier this month, I took several pictures to share on my blog.  My hope is the photos will portray the beauty and serenity of this special place where many people have found hope and healing.  Enjoy.

 

 

Things to come.......

During my life coaching trip to Hearts of Love's Big Creek Ranch, I was able to take photos of this special place to share on my blog.  Being mindful of our clients' right to privacy, only a picture or two will include images of clients.  However, all of the photos will reveal the beauty and serenity of the ranch where many clients have been helped.  This week we had clients visiting from Illinois, Indiana, Missouri, California, Texas, Israel and Holland.

My husband, Billy, had knee replacement surgery yesterday and will remain in the hospital through Monday.  I feel this is a blessing since the worst day post surgery is usually the third day.  He will be staying home for a few weeks during his initial recovery.  With the exception of a short trip next week, I will be sticking close to home, making sure Billy does not try to do too much too soon with his right leg.  Time at home will give me an opportunity to update my blog with photos and posts concerning my volunteer work, charity fundraising, community involvement and family time.

Thank you for taking the time to read this blog.  My prayer is something you read here will inspire you to seek help or encourage another to seek support when experiencing prolonged emotional trauma.  Also, perhaps reading this blog will spark an interest to consider volunteering your time or making a financial contribution to support Hearts of Love International, Go Red for Women or the Arnel Pineda Foundation for Street Kids.

There is nothing more fulfilling to the human spirit than giving of your time or your finances to people truly in need. 

Life coaching at Big Creek Ranch Retreat

For the next few days I will be life coaching nine clients at Big Creek Ranch.  As a personal crisis life coach volunteer, I work with clients who have become emotionally paralyzed because of tragic or unforseen life events.  Helping them to regain their life purpose and joy of living is my passion and my purpose.  Please pray for God to guide me as I lend a helping hand to these wonderful individuals.

Taking time to reflect on life's uncertainty......

It has been quite a while since I posted.  The last several months have been filled with unexpected events, and I feel at peace to share some of them with you.

My precious Mother passed away on August 1.  She had not been feeling well for at least two years, but her passing was a shock to all of us.  My parents had been married 57 years and were sweethearts in high school.  Daddy misses Mama, and he continues to grieve for her.  My brother, sister and I try to fill the void in Daddy's life.  We are enjoying spending extra time with him.

Shortly after Mama went home to Heaven, my sister's father-in-law had a heart attack while working at his ranch.  He did not survive.  His sudden passing was especially hard on my brother-in-law.  Father and son worked side by side every day on their ranch. 

The day before Thanksgiving, we had funeral services for my aunt.  She had been diagnosed with a rare brain tumor about the time we lost Mama.  Because of her age and the location of the tumor, the doctors could not operate.  Losing three family members in the space of four months was devastating.  It is a heavy reminder of how fragile life can be.

I have returned to life coaching for Hearts of Love.  Helping others who are hurting is the best medicine for my heart.  Also, I have dedicated myself to a fitness program under the direction of Frank Poff.  The exercise is challenging and exhaustive, but I have more energy than I have had in years!